Here is a thought, calling something Halal that should not even exist in the religion of Islam. We Muslims have caused this drastic change in the religion of Islam that along with having numerous factions fighting and killing each other there is dichotomy of taking extremism to great lengths and taking modernity to great lengths, consequently fighting to prove how one ideology is better than the other. If the extremists would stone to death people who have dated, the modern ones would stand up against the idea of whole dating endeavor.
Islam is all about moderation to begin with, on one hand it is a complete code of life, the ABCs of life, how to spend it, prayer timing, fasting, charity, marriage, kids, education or the society. Islam is not a ‘code’; it is a ‘code of life’ meaning you never let go of ‘living’.
The deal with coupledom is an easy one, if one person likes the other you should get married. End of story. But that is just the bottom line, there is more to the background of this ‘code’ than we think, and no it isn’t dating. When Bibi Khateeja found out about Muhammad she sent out a marriage proposal to him. But she found out about Muhammad first, she heard about his hard work and how honest he was. This sets example how important it is to know the person before marrying them and it is everyone’s right. Today we have families who were cheated because there was no proper investigation, there is the groom’s family stealing dowry, marrying more than one woman and then running away with the goods. There are news about how the bride’s family somehow managed to cheat, so it is completely fine to get to know people because marriage merges two families. Suddenly you have a bigger family and you all have to figure out about the expenses.
Then there is halal dating, it is not even a term it is two terms, one is halal and the other is dating and they are the exact opposite of each other but somehow they ended up together. It is more like saying the ‘religion of conservative liberals’ or vice versa, it has people wondering, how can two opposites be in one term and there are people acting out on such a term.
When you date it is not halal. When you ‘go out’ with someone, either you have intentions of marrying the person or not, it is not halal. Is it going to benefit you though? Perhaps. You might find out after dating someone that they are not right for you and you Thank God you did not get married to them. If arranged marriages end up in divorce who is to guarantee that a marriage resultant of dates is going to last?
It doesn’t really matter, whether you marry the person after getting to know them either via dating or by word of mouth. Go ahead and date away, go ahead and ask someone out, but don’t call it halal. It will never be halal. The argument here isn’t that ‘dating is wrong’ the argument here is just don’t make something ‘halal’ when it is not supported by religion. You don’t hear ‘halal drinking’, ‘halal suicide’ or ‘halal bikini’, it’s the same principle, no such thing as ‘halal dating’, because such are two terms that can never merge into one. Halal is marriage and dating is just, well, dating and nothing but. Date away, have fun, just don’t bring religion into it.
Article is written By Urooba Azhar, who is Mass Communication Graduate from Pakistan. These views are of writer itself and not of Dawn Travels or its partners in any way. Featured Image is courtesy of Azlan DuPree